


We Had Our Place In Time

by goddess_julie



Series: More/Everything [14]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Break Up, F/M, Genderswap, girl!Zayn, girl!direction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-01
Updated: 2015-01-01
Packaged: 2018-03-04 18:40:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3081848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goddess_julie/pseuds/goddess_julie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam and Sophia have been on again off again for a few years.  They're back on again when he gets an SOS text from Zayn.  She and Danny have broken up and Liam drops everything to rush to her side.   Sophia's tired of always taking a back seat to Liam's epic love for his best friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Had Our Place In Time

**Author's Note:**

> This is the accompanying piece to Eyes Of Stone Observe The Trends. This is Liam's version of the night that Danny and Zayn break up. A little insight to Liam and Sophia's relationship.

The walk from the gym to his apartment is relatively short. There were places he could go that had better equipment, more amenities and more benefits to a membership, but Joe’s Gym had everything that Liam wanted and needed in a gym. The people that went there were there to work out. They weren’t there to gossip about the latest parties or take selfies on the machines as they pretended to be there for fitness but were there to socialize and find a boyfriend or girlfriend. It was more like an old school gym with boxing rings and weights but a section that did have cardio machines to make it step enough into the modern times that they could charge a higher monthly rate for membership fees.

It had been the boxing which ultimately drew Liam through their doors. And now, four months after he’d first walked in Liam was an old face there. He’d been going five days a week once he’d met with one of Joe’s trainers who had seen potential in Liam early in. The regiment they had devised had consisted of weight training, boxing and at least a day of cardio and while Liam had confessed that he wasn’t interested in becoming a professional gym rat, he did feel that getting in shape and working on his body was something important to him.

The constant working out also had provided him with a healthy outlet for the overwhelming confusion and stress in his life. His final year of school had started less than a month earlier and with his future hanging in the balance of the next eight months, Liam knew he was going to have to make a lot of decisions.

The TV is on full blast when he walks into the flat that he and Andy share. He knows that he could have gotten an apartment in the same building that Harry, Louis and Nick as well as Niall and Zayn live in, but thought it was best that someone in their group have a place distanced from everyone else. At least that’s what he’d convinced everyone (including himself, he is aware of that now a year later) when he and Andy had accepted this apartment. But really, the most important reason he’d not wanted to live in the same building as everyone was that he needed a place to be where he couldn’t just walk into everyone’s place. Or they couldn’t just walk into his. He didn’t need the reminder of Zayn dating blokes that weren’t him. And he couldn’t bear the guilt that gnawed away at him when Sophia was over. It was awkward enough when they all went out; to live in such close quarters would surely end in disaster.

Not that it wasn’t one anyways.

“I ran into Sophia outside of the common,” Andy says as he enters the kitchen to find Liam perched against the counter. Liam is about to down half of the gallon of milk he’d bought and tries not to wince as his eyes flit around the room. He’s looking at everything except Andy, trying to avoid the other man’s gaze.

“Oh yeah?”

From the corner of his eye, Liam sees Andy nod. “And imagine how surprised I was when she came right up to me and hugged me. Told me that she is so looking forward to your date tonight.”

Liam’s hands are shaking when he returns the milk to the fridge.

“Huh.”

Silence falls over them until Liam finally meets his friend’s gaze. He hates the pity he sees in the depths of his eyes.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You or her?”

Liam shakes his head. He doesn’t understand the question. “I don’t…”

“Did you call her or did she call you?” 

He can’t contain the sigh that escapes his lips. “Well.” When Andy raises an eyebrow Liam’s shoulders and chest deflate. “Fuck. Neither really. Niall and I had gone for a few drinks last night at the pub. She was there with her friends. We’d both stayed away but then we ran into each other and started talking…”

Liam really hates the look of pity on his friend’s face right now. 

“Dude, this isn’t fair. For either of you.”

“You don’t know Andy,” Liam argues. “It’s just, I miss her. I miss us and the good times, and just being with her. She’s great and I care about her a lot. I can’t not try.”

“She is great, and I know you care about her,” Andy pleads. “But caring about her and being in love with Zayn is what ended things the last time. And the time before that. There were a lot of good times,” he agrees gently. “But there were the bad times and…”

“And it’s my choice,” Liam says firmly. He stands up and gives the other man a shrug. “It’s my choice. It’s just a date and we’re just going to talk.”

“Talking with you two ends up in bed. With awkward stilted conversation in the morning around the table that ends with you both worse off than …”

“My choice,” Liam reminds him. He fixes Andy with a glare that dares him to continue the conversation. When he receives a sigh and a shrug he relaxes. “Great. I’m glad you understand.”

“I don’t understand. But you’re right. It’s not my call to make. I’ll just be here when the Liam and Sophia Show goes down again and we all pretend we didn’t see it coming.”

Liam walks into his bedroom and starts to take off his workout clothes. When he makes his way to the bathroom he calls out to Andy one more time. “You know I love you though, right mate? For caring?”

He receives Andy’s middle finger in response and chuckles as he heads into the bathroom to take his shower and get himself ready for his date with Sophia.

~*~

It’s not like any time that they’ve agreed to give it another go there has been an intention to sabotage the relationship. It just seems to happen that way. If Liam were to listen to Harry’s advice, he would believe that it was because he and Zayn just need to get their shit together and admit they’re in love with each other and any relationship that either of them have that aren’t with each other are doomed to fail. But Liam thinks that Harry is too much of a romantic and that because his relationship with Louis has been idealistic that everyone’s should be.

The thing about Sophia is that Liam genuinely does like her. He cares about her more than people realize and wishes beyond a doubt that it had been her he’d fallen in love with, not Zayn. Not to say that he resents being in love with Zayn because she truly is amazing and he can never and will never be able to picture himself with anyone else, but when things are good with Sophia, they’re effortless. The two of them are brilliant friends; it is only when they make the attempt for more that things tend to crumble around them.

It is something that they’ve both sat down to fully discuss. Liam knows why Andy was worried when he’d learned that he and Sophia were making another go of it. It was easy. It was familiar. And most of all neither were able to really stay away from each other for too long. Mainly, it was because through all of the stress and fighting, Liam and Sophia were very similar. He’s often wondered that if there weren’t romantic history between them, if they’d never crossed that line, if they would be brilliant best friends.

But they have and no matter what they say or do, there will always be this history looming over them. The night he’d argued with Andy about Sophia, they had sat down to talk. Friends. They would start out as friends and take things slowly. He doesn’t want to hurt her and he knows she doesn’t want to hurt him. Zayn is and always has been the big white elephant looming in the room and while neither of them mentions her, it goes without saying that she has the power to break them.

Liam was stunned when Sophia admitted she can’t even blame Zayn for it. “It’s like, she doesn’t even realize it, does she?” Sophia had asked in genuine honesty. “Here you are, pining for her for years and she doesn’t even have to do anything and you drop everything for her. If she was trying to get between us, I could hate her. But it’s you I should hate, not her.”

“I’m sorry.” Liam hadn’t known how to respond to that statement. Truthfully, he still doesn’t. Instead of her getting angry with him Sophia had shrugged and grasped his hand in hers.

“But I can’t hate you. Because I’m too in love with you to hate you. And I should leave but I can’t because of that same reason. So I guess I take what I can get until you can’t give anymore.”

A month has passed since that night and while things are good between them, it just feels like they’re more of friends than anything else. 

Their plan for the night was to see an early movie and then head out for dinner afterwards. Liam can sense that the way the night is going, if he wants to, Sophia is more than up for spending the night with him. Her touches have lingered, her lips grazing his ear playfully when she had moved in to speak to him during the movie. He can feel his groin tighten at the thought of them getting dinner and then taking her back to his for a very satisfying night of the sex they’ve denied themselves for the past four weeks.

“So what do you feel like eating?” He asks as they walk hand in hand to where he’s parked the car. She pauses to pull him close and leans up to nudge his nose playfully. 

“You?” She answers with a sultry grin. He laughs and leans down, covering her mouth with his.

“Thought we were gonna get food.”

“We can get food after. We’ll call for take away. Haven’t you missed me?”

Liam groans and kisses her deeply. “You know I have.” He’s about to say fuck it to dinner and drive her back to his when a familiar tone rings from his pocket. 

_Danny just dumped me. Was a right cunt about it. Need you._

Instantly Liam’s stomach is filled with dread, his chest with anger. He practically growls at the message on his screen. Looking up, he sees a familiar expression of resignation on Sophia’s face. Just as he’s about to open his mouth she shakes her head.

“It’s Zayn.”

Liam can’t lie. He nods and moves to apologize. 

“Is she hurt?” 

Liam sees how Sophia is genuinely concerned for Zayn. Like she isn’t what is standing between her and him being happy together. For what feels like the millionth time in two years, Liam knows he’s a massive twat. This woman is far too good for him. 

“She’s fine. Just …upset. Danny dumped her.” He knows if it was anyone else, he would text them and let them know he’d be by in the morning if they wanted. But the thought of Zayn being upset, so upset that she’d texted him saying she needed him, there is nothing that would keep him away from her apartment. “I just…”

“Have to go. I know.”

“I’ll drive you,” Liam offers. He opens the passenger side door, startled when she shakes her head.

“I’ll call a cab,” Sophia says firmly. When he moves to argue, she grips his arm tight. “I want to call a cab. I need to be alone Liam, please.”

He feels as though he should at least give her money for a taxi. Another gesture she shakes off. He’s not going to make this about himself. She deserves that much at least. 

“We need to talk.”

Sophia nods. “Call me tomorrow. Tell her I’m sorry. But you’re both single now. Maybe it’s time.”

With a trembling hand, Liam rubs his forehead in frustration. “Sophia. We’re going to talk about this.”

“It’s the one thing we don’t really talk about, isn’t it? We both pretend it’s not there but it gets us to the same place every time.”

Liam leans down to kiss her forehead gently. “Get home safe.”

“I will Liam.”

Once he has made sure Sophia has gotten into a taxi, Liam looks down at his phone. Ten minutes have passed since Zayn texted him. Without even thinking, he dials her number and listens to it ringing. He knows immediately when she answers that she’s been crying. Maybe he’ll have time to find Danny and beat him up before he heads over to Zayn’s flat. He’ll have to see.

“Lo?”

“Zee, you home? I’m on my way over.” 

“What’s up? Everything okay?” Liam can tell that she’s trying her best to sound like nothing’s wrong. Like she’s not bawling wherever she is.

“You tell me? I just got your text about Danny, I’m on my way over, so are you at your flat?”

His heart flutters when Zayn admits she’d been trying to text Louis. He’d thought he was her first choice and it stings that he wasn’t but he won’t let that stop him from going over. It’s then he realizes she thought he was on a date. He was but he didn’t want her to think he was. That guilt that always seems to bubble up cracks through his heart.

“Too late babe, I’ve already told Soph that we’re done for the night. I’ll call her tomorrow. Or whatever. I’m on my way.”

“Soph? You two on again?”

Liam groans as he pretends that its disappointment he hears in her tone rather than disbelief. “For now. Who the fuck knows. We’re not talking about my fucked up relationships, we’re talking about yours. Get the movies ready. See you soon.”

He makes two stops on his way across town. The first for some Indian food. He’s starving and he knows that nothing calms a broken heart better than an abundance of take away. Especially spicy take away. The second stop he makes is for wine. With one bottle in his hand he realizes that if Zayn was crying, something must have happened. If Danny has touched her in any way, Liam will personally make sure he won’t be touching anyone else. Ever. Zayn’s not one to break down, especially at the hands of a boyfriend so he must have said or done something that caused the tears. And for that, he’s certain that two bottles of wine will be necessary. Before he knows it, Liam has pulled up to the building that his friends all live in and heads straight to Niall and Zayn’s apartment. He runs up the stairs and is knocking on her door in moments.

“Delivery!” He says, letting himself in. Upon first glance there doesn’t look like there has been any type of struggle in the apartment. As he gives Zayn a once over, he is pleased to notice that she’s not got any bruises or signs of distress other than her swollen eyes from crying. He flashes her a smile when he returns from the kitchen with two glasses for the wine.

“Vindaloo AND wine Leeyum?” Zayn begins to cry as Liam fills her wine glass. The tears are streaming down her face causing for Liam to panic.

“Oh no, babe,” Liam pulls the glass from her hand and places it on the table in front of them. He pulls her into his arms and holds her tight. “Get it out love, get it out now so we can enjoy the rest of the night.” The harder she tries to talk, the more she cries. “Shhhh, babe.” Liam sooths softly, rocking them both back and forth. “Let’s have some curry and wine and you can tell me what a cunt Danny is.”

Danny is a cunt, Liam has always thought so. Not just because they’ve been dating while Liam has had to sit back and watch her with him. But because he knows nothing about Zayn. He doesn’t know who she is under the façade that she puts on for people. Everything she holds dear, he thinks is ridiculous. He’s taken everything she is for granted from the moment they’d met and started dating and Liam knows that he’s biased, but Danny hadn’t taken care of Zayn nearly half as well as he should have.

The more Zayn tells him of what transpired earlier that night, the angrier Liam is getting. The hateful words spewed at her. The accusations Danny had made. How deeply he’d hurt her. It was as if he’d known every single weakness she had and had been cataloguing it to use it against her.

“He better hope he doesn’t run into me or Nialler,” Liam admits with a snarl in his voice. He’s generally not a violent man, but seeing Zayn broken is enough for Liam to change his mind on that. 

“Niall doesn’t even know, only you do,” Zayn admits softly. She’s tucked her legs underneath herself and is curled up against Liam’s side. He closes his eyes and plays both evenings out in his mind. Had Zayn texted Louis like she’d intended, he would be at home right now, engaged in a night of multiple orgasms and fantastic sex with Sophia. At no point does he regret Zayn’s mistake. He’d take this, being curled up with Zayn a million times over any night anywhere with anyone else.

They’re both quiet for a while watching the movie Zayn had put on when he can feel how tense Zayn is getting. It’s as though she is replaying every word that Danny had tossed at her. Liam thought he’d hated the other man before. It was nothing to the rage he felt now. “You know he’s wrong right?”

He feels Zayn shrug. She’s refusing to meet his eyes and he turns to face her properly.

“Zee?”

“He’s not wrong, is he? I am selfish. I get lost in myself and my own shit and I forget everything and everyone around me.”

“Fuck that,” Liam is furious. He and Sophia have had plenty of knock down drag out fights, but never would he ever use her insecurities against her for the sake of saving face. And she’d never done the same to him. Liam couldn’t respect people who resorted to bullying like that when angry. “That’s not the same thing. He was saying it to be a prick. We all get lost in our own shit, that doesn’t give him any right to use it against you.”

“Li…” Liam watches Zayn try to find her words. “I just … we were friends and even he couldn’t stand to be with me. Maybe he’s right, maybe I’m just not meant to be loved.”

“How can you even think that? You are so loved, by everyone who knows you Zee. I love you. Niall loves you, hell you know how often he says he can’t live without you, how you mean the world to him. And Lou and Haz? You can’t say you’re unlovable because it’s not true.” Liam knows that this isn’t the time to confess his love for her. She’s in no position to hear it and he doesn’t want her to dismiss it because she thinks he’s being kind. He is also worried that if she does reciprocate, he will confuse her using him as a rebound and he knows his heart can’t handle it. Instead, he bites the inside of his cheek and prays that he can keep his feelings quiet.

He manoeuvers them so that they’re lying on the couch, Zayn curled up against him with her head on his chest. The last thing he wants is her crying more, so he needs to lighten the mood.

“Plus,” Liam says with a laugh. “You can’t take anything he says seriously he wouldn’t know beauty if it kicked him in the dick. The twat didn’t know the difference between Marvel and DC. Remember when we went to see Avengers and he wondered where Batman was?”

She starts to giggle and Liam lets his body relax. 

“You’re beautiful Zee. He knew you were too good for him, that he didn’t deserve you and he couldn’t compete. So he had to put you down so he could feel like a man. Plus, he probably has a small cock.”

Zayn looks up and bursts into drunken laughter. “No, it was alright. Average size I guess. Didn’t really know what he was doing with it. Stuck it in and thought that was good enough.”

“See, he did you a favour. No one deserves an average cock with no ability to use it. Probably never made you come.” Liam refuses to think about all of the ways he knows he’d be able to make Zayn come. He closes his eyes and lets him have one fantasy before he shakes it off and tries to control himself. The last thing Zayn needs is him perving on her when she’s vulnerable.

“Even had to fake it a few times just to end it so he’d go to sleep,” Zayn admits. “Got of meself with my bullet”

Liam tries not to cheer at the news. He supresses a grin and presses a kiss to the crown of Zayn’s head to distract her. “Doesn’t know the difference between Marvel and DC. Average cock. Never made you come. Probably subpar at oral. I say tomorrow, you call him and thank him. Hell, maybe Niall and I won’t beat the crap out of him. Probably already knows what a waste of space he is. Let his next girlfriend deal with him. We’ll send her a card. Sorry about your new boy. Good luck, get a vibe.”

They both break out into drunken laughter at Danny’s expense. For the first time since he’d arrived earlier, Liam can feel Zayn relax fully against him. Their breathing has synced together and while he’s carding one hand through her hair in soothing motions, his other hand is curled with hers, their fingers tangled together.

“Thanks Leeyum,” Zayn whispers softly. “I meant to text Lou, but I’m glad I got you instead.”

“Me too babe. Any time you need me, I’ll be here. Nothing is more important than you, okay?” He reaches down to tilt up her chin so that she’s looking at him. He hates the uncertainty in her eyes, the nervousness and sadness that is etched there. 

“Thanks, Li. Love you.” 

It’s not something they’ve never said to one another. In fact, all five of them are very liberal with their affection, vocal about how they feel about each other and how much they mean to one another. Liam closes his eyes and lets her words wash over him. 

“Love you to Zee. Always will.”

It’s only moments later that Liam feels himself drifting off. He wakes up with the sun shining directly through the window over his face. One glance at his watch tells him it’s still early, before ten but Zayn is passed out, curled beside him and hogging most of the afghan that Niall must have covered them with.

Liam doesn’t want to leave without at least telling Zayn he’s going. The last thing he wants is her to wake up alone, like he snuck out in the morning, like she didn’t mean enough to him that he’d let her know. 

“Zee,” Liam whispers against her forehead. “Gotta move. I have to go.”

Zayn starts to squirm when he begins to tickle her. He knows how much she hates it and if anything is going to wake her up, it’ll be that. What he’s not expecting is for her to rear back, half asleep and punch him in the dick.

“What the fuck?” He squeals, falling off the couch and cupping himself.

“You tell me?” She hisses meanly. “You know the rules, tickle me and get a punch to the junk.” She looks at the clock on the wall and groans. “Wait, come here for a second.”

Liam raises an eyebrow. “Why?”

“So I can punch you in the dick again.”

“What for?”

“Waking me up before noon.”

“I was just letting you know I’m going,” Liam approaches cautiously. He still has one hand over his cock and pulls her in with his other arm. “You gonna be okay babe?”

Zayn blinks her eyes open fully and flashes Liam a smile as she nods. “Thank you Leeyum.”

When he pulls away she yawns. Before he knows it, he’s doubled over in pain after she’s punched him in the dick again.

“Next time, leave a fucking note.”

With that Liam finds himself alone in the living room. Sore dick but a giant smile on his face. He doesn’t check his phone until he gets down to his car. There are no messages on his phone. He texts Sophia and waits. Moments later she responds.

“Let’s go to the café. You know the one. Meet you there in forty.”

Liam knows it’s over. He knows because he’d rather be alone without Zayn than in a relationship with someone who isn’t her. Liam also knows that last night was the final straw for Sophia. He’d been given an unspoken ultimatum. Zayn or Sophia. The worst part was that he hadn’t even had to think about it. There was no choice.

He’s kept waiting fifteen minutes when she shows up. It’s not like her to be late, but it’s clear that she’s upset. He has no right to be angry and instead, he tells her to sit and that he’ll get their order from the counter. Before he walks away she stops him.

“I think I’ll order for myself,” she says with a smile. “It’s time for a change.” 

She comes back with a hot chocolate and piece of fudge brownie. Decidedly different from the mulled cider and muffin she normally gets. This feels less awkward than Liam had expected but still harder than he wants.

“I’m sorry,” he says honestly. “For everything.”

“I know you are.” Sophia takes a few calming breaths and gives a gentle smile. He can see how upset she is, how much this is taking from her and he wants to reach out and comfort her. Liam just isn’t sure how welcome it would be right now. Instead, he keeps his hands rooted firmly on his coffee mug. “It’s not enough. This isn’t enough.”

“You have to know, I’ve never…”

Sophia’s laugh startles him. Her head is thrown back and she has the attention of everyone in hearing distance. “You think I don’t know that?” She asks with a snort. “God, you’re the worst liar I know. Of course I know you’ve never cheated on me. You may be an asshole, but you’re not heartless. And that’s why I can’t hate you.”

He can’t find the words to respond so Liam keeps quiet. His pulse hammering and his hands trembling. 

“God Liam. I have tried to hate you. I have tried to think of you as the monster in this situation, but you’re not. And I hate you for that. I hate that you’re so nice, so … everything. And you’re kind of selfish. You can’t have her so you’ve had me. But you’ve no problem in disposing of me when you don’t need me and coming back for me when you do. And I’ve let you. I’ve let you because you’re so utterly lovely. You’re hot, good in bed and underneath the selfishness you’re a great person Liam. But you’re not going to let me be miserable anymore. You’re not going to make me miserable anymore.”

“Can we be friends?” All of the air whooshes out of Liam’s chest when she shakes her head.

“I don’t think so. At least not for a long time Liam Payne. Just because you have no problem being just friends with the person you’re in love with, doesn’t mean I feel the same way. Aren’t you tired of being miserable without her?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

The pity on Sophia’s face makes Liam angry. She has no right to pity him, especially when she has no idea what she’s talking about.

“You can’t even be honest when we’re breaking up. If you’re not going to be honest with me, be honest with yourself at least.”

He steels his jaw and avoids her gaze. Liam refuses to give her a reaction. From the corner of his eye he watches her drain the remainder of her hot chocolate. 

“Fine.” She stands up and hauls her purse over her shoulder. When she’s packed the remainder of her brownie in its package and put it in her purse she turns to face him. “Have a nice life Liam Payne. Don’t call me.”

There is no way he can let her walk out without at least acknowledging the end. He gives her a wry smile. “And if you call me?” He’s not expecting her sarcastic laughter.

“Please, do us both a favour and don’t answer.”

With that, he’s left alone at the table. An employee of the café comes by and clears off the dirty dishes and with a thud; Liam’s forehead meets the table in front of him. He pulls out his phone and fires of one text to three recipients.

_The Sophia and Liam show has henceforth been cancelled. Permanently._

All three send back nearly identical responses.

_About time, mate._

Liam can’t help but chuckle when another text follows.

_Sorry about your dick._

He knows Zayn doesn’t know about his break up with Sophia. She’s unaware of how sorry his dick is going to feel in the next while, what with her mean right hook and no sexual outlet in the foreseeable future. Before he can respond she texts him again.

_Thanks again for last night. Love you._

There isn’t any doubt that he’s done the right thing. Liam just now needs to reconcile the fact that Zayn’s his forever and at some point, she’s going to have to find out. He sighs and starts to type into his phone.

_Any time Zee. Love you._


End file.
